Lessons from 2023
I’ve written about 2022 and 2021 lessons and reflections, check it out if you want.
As the year wraps, it’s that annual tradition to write about some valuable lessons learned for 2023. I’ve always encouraged friends and family to take time for reflection because you start to notice what has worked, what hasn’t, and any mental shifts you’ve made, and ultimately, it centers you and provides a guideline for the direction you should head to next.
Direction and velocity
This brings me to my first lesson learned—direction and velocity are vital. You must not only know WHERE you’re going but how FAST you’re going as well. If you don’t know where you’re going, you’ll just be led anywhere and go nowhere. Even if you know where to go, it’s important to get there with a strong purpose and speed.
If it doesn’t get done, then all that direction is for naught.
Yes, you can take baby steps, but force yourself to do a little more and a little faster. The compounding effect doesn’t kick in until you get good at something. That’s why getting good quickly is a huge advantage.
Once you’ve become proficient, the way you think about things changes and the people you get to interact with will provide new insights and opportunities. That’s only earned through a reputation of being great.
Perhaps it’s one of the things I’ve changed my mind about this past year—starting isn’t enough, you have to press the gas towards greatness. Challenge yourself to do more.
Take care of your camp
I’ve written about this in past reflections but this is something I will die on the hill for—be a great friend to people that are on your side. I’m not talking about people who just blindly agree with everything you say or do, but people who genuinely care about you.
The toughest part was getting into the mindset to make it natural to think about your people. Especially for me, this was not a normal thing growing up, and it was definitely not taught to me.
Like any other skill, it takes time and effort to make it natural. I found that it helps to establish it as an identity, the habits seem to stick and actions come easier. I want to be someone who selflessly helps others, especially my good friends. I want nothing back in return but to see them succeed and prosper.
I also understand that a good friend doesn’t always agree with everything they do and say. There are times when I need to tell them they’re wrong and provide the unwanted truth.
Good friends don’t have to sugarcoat facts and reality, and good friends don’t have to hesitate to help each other.
Things are finite
As morbid as it may sound, you only get to enjoy the things you love most for so many more times. The sport you love to play all comes to an end. That’s how it felt for many of my high school teammates. It crept up faster than expected and we still all talk about our basketball team to this day.
The inverse is also true, the bad things only last for so long. The breakup you’ve had, yes it sucks now but it’ll be a moment in time years down the road.
As much as we should be appreciative and grateful for all the good things, we need to understand that the bad times should be met with the same attitude.
It’s precisely the finite quality of good and bad things that make life so good. It brings a fresh perspective of doing everything you love like it’s the last time you’ll do it, and to cherish the bad times because it will make you better.
This means we should do our absolute best to not waste time on the things that don’t matter. If we know that things are finite, let’s focus on getting better at those things so you can enjoy them even more.
Playing the game
Work politics is a draining game to play. Incentives, narratives, and groupthink mentality play a big part in pop culture and work environments. Even if you dread playing the game, you must at least know the rules.
I failed to do so a bunch of times and had to work extra hard to either get my boss off my back or to build my reputation back to gain access to opportunities. You can’t just not play the game if that’s the culture of the environment.
You either create your own business where you make the rules or learn to navigate your workplace.
This makes having good people and developing good relationships is so important. There aren’t a lot of good people when the game is played because they all have something they want to achieve. Whether that’s at your expense or not, it’s good to have honest and trustworthy people on your team.
If you have a bad reputation, good luck attracting them.
You have to know the rules, the people who make major decisions, and the ones that you can’t piss off.
If it sounds exhausting, it’s because it is. Unfortunately, those are the rules and you’ll have to play by them.
Getting too comfortable
A lesson I’ve mentioned before, but it’s something that’s easily taught to me by life every single year. Getting too comfortable with being comfortable. The moment you think you’re good, life delivers a slice of humble pie.
This doesn’t mean you won’t ever be happy with your progress. It simply means you did a good job getting here, but there’s still more to do and much to improve upon.
I’ve read a quote that sums it up:
you didn’t come this far, just to come this far.
Our standards with ourselves should be higher because we are capable of achieving great things.
Who cares if you won’t achieve it, you won’t know that until you’ve done your absolute best.
There’s beauty in the struggle and the process.
I’m looking forward to doing more things out of my comfort zone for 2024.
Have a great New Year everyone!
Check out my last article on My top 5 articles of 2023*
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